


All I Need

by captainamergirl



Category: Days of Our Lives
Genre: AUBBY, Affairs, Alternate History, Extramarital Affairs, F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-07-17
Updated: 2020-07-19
Packaged: 2021-03-05 05:22:00
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,291
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25329235
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/captainamergirl/pseuds/captainamergirl
Summary: What if Austin & Abby really had slept together all those years ago? What if the attraction was not at all one-sided? Imagine Austin reciprocated her feelings but was torn about them, because of course, he's married. {Alternate History Aubby}
Relationships: Abigail Deveraux/Austin Reed
Comments: 4





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> Set in 2011. Austin is played by Patrick Muldoon here and Abby by Kate Mansi. Enjoy!

** Prologue **   
  
“Can I get you anything?” Melanie asked. She rested her chin on her best friend’s shoulder as they sat in front of the fiery hearth. Abby was so close to the heat of the flames and yet she felt nothing. A fierce chill was wrapped around her heart and body.   
  
Abby clutched the sleeves of her jacket tightly with her tiny fingers as she stared at the dancing flames. She had been burnt tonight big-time, but not by the fire in the hearth. No, it had happened when she saw Austin and Carrie kissing not twenty-four hours after he had made love to her.   
  
She now had true, first-hand knowledge, of what profound heart break really felt like.   
  
“Austin,” she murmured. “He’s all I want. He’s all I need.”   
  
Maybe she was pathetic to give her heart to a man who was married, but he had to have felt something too. How could he not? The searing memory of his touch and kisses was all over every inch of her body that he had caressed and fondled during their night together. It had just been sex to him, maybe, but not to her. Definitely not to her.   
  
A single tear trickled down her cheek and she closed her eyes. She pictured Austin the way he was with her the night before. Sure, he had been a little drunk, but when they were making love, when he was staring into her eyes and seeing into her soul, he had certainly known exactly who he was making love to. He had called out Abby's name as they fell over the edge of passion together. Abby’s name had torn from his lips, not his wife’s!   
  
How could Austin act like what they had done meant nothing to him? Had she really misread him so badly? Was he just another Chad – just another guy out there who was all about himself and scratching his itches with multiple women? She didn’t know, but she didn’t want to believe Austin could be so cold. The truth was, she was in love with Austin and now there was no going back. There was no way she could ever just be his assistant again, or even his friend. They had burnt their bridges today and the night before as well. There was no going back to the status quo and it hurt Abby. She had put her heart on the line only to have it broken all over again.


	2. Chapter One

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Note: Austin and Carrie have gone to a hotel to try to work on their marital problems. That's where they are in this chapter.

** Chapter 1 **  
  
Abby ended up falling asleep sometime during the night; right on the carpet beside Melanie and when she dreamt, she dreamt of Austin and of all the ways he had made her feel so special. In the cold light of morning, as she awoke though, she didn’t feel so special. Not at all. She felt sick and terribly forlorn.  
  
She gently disentangled herself from Melanie, so as not to wake her friend, and climbed to her feet. She sagged heavily against the wall for a moment under the weight of her crippling grief and then walked towards the kitchen. She found her mother inside the kitchen preparing muffins for breakfast.  
  
“Hey, honey,” Jennifer greeted her.  
  
“Hey,” Abby muttered and started to back out of the kitchen because she didn’t want to talk to anyone, but Jennifer set aside the muffin pan and moved to her side, grasping her arm.  
  
“What’s going on? You look like …”  
  
“Hell?” Abby snapped. “Yeah, well I’ve been through it, for sure.” She wished she hadn’t said anything. Now Jennifer was duty-bound to ask her what had happened and the last thing she wanted was to tell her mom that she had given her body and soul to a man who couldn’t be bothered to return her affections.  
  
“Hey, hey,” Jennifer said and cupped Abby’s chin in her hand. “What’s going on? You can tell me anything.”  
  
Abby shook her head. “No, not this,” she said and yanked almost violently from her mother’s grasp. Jennifer called after her, but Abby kept walking away -- _running_ really.  
  
She found Melanie waking up in the living room. “Hey, Abs,” Melanie said tentatively.  
  
“Hey,” Abby murmured. “How are you?”  
  
“How am I? I am not the one who-“  
  
Abby shook her head. “Don’t say it. Mom’s on Snoop Patrol again.”  
  
Melanie nodded and climbed to her feet. “Are you going to tell her – or anyone else that…?”  
  
Abby shook her head. “No. I mean, I would have had to eventually if Au – you know, if he and I went public, but apparently that’s not going to happen now. Or ever.” Her eyes filled with fresh tears and Melanie reached out to pull her friend into a hug, but Abby shook it off.  
  
“Thanks, but I’ll be fine,” she said, not sounding convincing to her own ears. “Nothing a little time won’t cure. I am going to take a shower and then I have to get to the office and –“ She broke off and her eyes went as wide as Melanie’s. “Ohmigod. I can’t go there, now can I? He won’t want any reminders of what happened, and actually, neither do I. I want – I want to just be alone and die.”  
  
“Abby, don’t say that.”  
  
“It’s true,” Abby said.  
  
“Promise me you won’t hurt yourself!”  
  
Abby shook her head. “It’s tempting, but nothing could hurt me worse than his not loving me.” She turned on her heel and hurried up the stairs. She made it as far as her room before crumpling in a heap of tears.  
  
XoXoXo  
  
 _Austin had dreams that felt more like memories than anything. He was with Abby Deveraux and he was kissing every inch of her young, supple body. Her tits were so pert and bouncy, her skin so silky and smooth, her pussy so tight... She tasted and felt like sweet sin._  
  
He awoke with a start, a sheen of sweat on his heated skin. He looked over at Carrie who was still sound asleep and he thanked god for that. He had had a very erotic dream and he didn’t need her asking him why he was so aroused. But a dream … was it really a dream … It had felt so real.  
  
He sighed and climbed out from underneath the covers, headed for the shower. He needed to get the stink of his amorous, sinful thoughts off of him.  
  
XoXoXo  
  
When Austin emerged from the shower, he found Carrie sitting up in bed. He offered her a smile that felt forced even to him. “Hey, babe,” he said.  
  
“Hi,” she said. “How’d you sleep?”  
  
He nodded slowly. “Good … You?”  
  
“Good…”  
  
The room fell into potent silence then as he scurried around, getting dressed. He threw on a sweater and a pair of slacks and then turned back to face his wife. “Breakfast …” He said. “What should we do about that?”  
  
“Room service?” Carrie suggested.  
  
“Yeah, that sounds good,” he said.  
  
“Alright… Let me just check my messages,” Carrie said and held up a hand to she could stop him. “Don’t be mad, okay? I just want to make sure we didn’t miss anything.”  
  
“Like what?” Austin shrugged. “Never mind. Go ahead. I will call down with the house phone while you’re doing that.” If he was honest with himself, he would admit that he was glad Carrie was occupied so they had less time to talk and dwell on the many things that were wrong between them. He loved his wife, but he was having serious doubts that they would be able to work things out when they hardly had two words to say to each other anymore.  
  
***  
  
After a warm shower in which Abby cried until she didn’t know where the tears started and the water ended, she emerged from the bathroom with a towel wrapped around her body. She quickly slipped into her room and began to dry herself. She happened to step in front of the full-length mirror, and that’s when she noticed the light flush of her skin fade away to reveal little love marks all over her body. It was going to be harder to forget Austin than she had believed…  
  
She touched the little hickey above her left breast and felt new tears fill her eyes. She had never felt more broken, more vulnerable, or depressed. She wanted to crawl into a hole and just die, but it wasn’t an option.  
  
She sighed as she turned away from the mirror and began to pull on a pair of jeans. She still ached in all the right places from Austin’s touch. She didn’t know if she could take the feeling much longer. She sighed and quickly snapped the button on her jeans before slipping on a bulky sweater that she wanted to hide inside of. She would have to emerge from the house eventually, but she hoped that today was not that day. She just wanted to rest. She had never felt more exhausted as she crawled into bed and quickly fell asleep again.  
  
XoXoXo  
  
Austin and Carrie ate breakfast in near-silence, only asking each other how they liked their food, and then Carrie suggested they head home. Austin felt relieved. Undeniably relieved.  
  
“Time to head back to Salem, huh?” Austin said as soon as they were gathering their stuff and getting ready to check out of the hotel.  
  
“Yes,” Carrie said. “We can’t hide out here forever, as nice as that would be.”  
  
Soon enough they were in the car heading back to Salem. Carrie drove as Austin pretended to sleep in the passenger seat to avoid conversation. He sensed Carrie would appreciate that as well. They just had little to talk about that didn’t involve their mistakes. Although his were infinitely worse, he realized. It was beginning to dawn on him that he really had slept with Abby. He remembered kissing her, holding her, telling her she was amazing, but now other memories were beginning to bubble up to the surface.  
  
He slowly drifted off to sleep for real and was soon he was back in his office.   
_  
Abby was there, pressed underneath his naked body, his hands were snaking between their nude bodies; his fingers were thumbing her tits and moving downwards to the crest of her womanhood. His fingers sluiced inside of her pussy and she cried out his name. Soon he replaced his fingers with his dick and they began to rock in time.  
  
“Abby!” Her name ripped from his lips._  
  
“Austin … _Austin?!”_  
  
A familiar voice cut through his dream-memory and he opened his eyes, turning to look at Carrie. She was watching his sideways as they sat at a red light. He flushed in the face.  
  
“You just said Abby's name – actually you screamed it.”  
  
Austin shifted uncomfortably on the seat. “Did I?”  
  
“Yeah, yeah, you did,” Carrie said tersely.  
  
Austin shook his head. “I was just dreaming, I guess …”  
  
“That much I gather. But what about exactly?” Carrie asked.  
  
Austin shifted still more in his seat and Carrie sighed. “Is there something you want to tell me?”  
  
“Yeah … the light just turned green. Drive…”  
  
XoXoXo  
  
“Abby, _Abby!”_ Jennifer’s voice cut through Abby’s deep slumber.  
  
She looked up to see her mother standing above her. “What do you want?” Abby demanded.  
  
“Melanie just left. She asked me to tell you ‘good bye’ for her. I just saw you lying here and was going to leave, but then I noticed the tears on your face …”  
  
Abby sat up groggily and wiped her face which was indeed moist with new tears. She hadn’t even realized she was crying in her sleep. She sighed. “Mom, I don’t want to talk about this. Not with you of all people.”  
  
“Abigail…”  
  
“No, Mom, I can’t.”  
  
“Please, sweetheart, tell me what’s going on. You’re clearly upset. I want to help.”  
  
“You want to help? You can leave me alone just like everyone else has.”  
  
Jennifer looked hurt and for a moment, Abby felt badly, but then she realized, she didn’t _want_ to care about anyone. She couldn’t. She already hurt too damn much.  
  
She quickly climbed out of bed and started for the door of her room. “Abby!” Jennifer called after her.  
  
“If you won’t leave me alone, I’ll go somewhere where I can find some damn peace,” Abby thundered and hurried out the door and down the steps.  
  
XoXoXo  
  
Carrie and Austin arrived back at their place and right away, silence fell between them again. Austin was glad she had stopped peppering him with questions about Abby, but silence sometimes was just as loud as any scream.  
  
He carried their bags into their room and set them down. Carrie stayed in the living room checking all the messages on the answering machine like her life depended on it.  
  
He was feeling restless and the small place felt very confining to him so he stood and walked to the back door and slipped out of it, figuring Carrie wouldn’t notice.  
  
He needed to clear his mind.  
  
XoXoXo  
  
Abby walked all the way to the park and ended up slumping on a bench in the heart of the playground. The playground was empty and that was the way she preferred it. Even if it hurt, she wanted to be alone now. It was better that way.  
  
She sat there for the longest time and was just about to stand up and go when she looked up to see none other than Austin standing on the bridge not thirty feet away. The breath immediately stole from her lungs and she felt tears film her eyes. Dammit, why did he have to be so gorgeous? Why did he have to be so … _Austin?_  
  
He leaned on the bridge railing and she thought about hurrying off before he spotted her, but then she felt his eyes come to rest on her.  
  
 _“Abby?”_ He said in a voice that made her heart flutter involuntarily.  
  
There was no escaping now. There was no escaping him or the feelings she had for him. They were going to have to talk and she had a feeling things were going to get ugly.


	3. Chapter Two

**Chapter 2**  
  
She instinctively moved towards him but he quickly jumped away from her. _“Don’t,”_ he said. “Stay there.”  
  
Abby trembled with indignation. “God, Austin! Am I so disgusting to you now that you can’t even bear to be on the same bridge as me?”  
  
“Abby –“ He started and then shook his head. “It’s not that.”  
  
“Then what is? Why are you acting like I’m some kind of parasite who latched onto you? We _made love,_ Austin, and as much as you would like to forget it, I can’t. I can’t!” she cried.  
  
“Keep your voice down,” Austin scolded her as if she were a petulant child. The whole time she had been his assistant, he had never treated as anything but an equal, and now that they had had sex, it was as if he was doing everything that he could to shame her for it.  
  
Tears pooled in her eyes once again and she willed herself to hold them back, but it was so hard looking into Austin’s beautiful eyes and seeing regret and disdain there. She had known when they slept together that it would change things, but she hadn't expected it to be like this. She had stupidly believed that he would finally admit that he wanted to be with her. This all hurt her so badly.  
  
Austin sighed. “Don’t cry,” he said. “I can handle anything but that.”  
  
“How can you ask me not to feel hurt after the way you are just tossing me aside like yesterday’s garbage?” Abigail asked quietly. “You are treating me like I’m nothing.”  
  
“I don’t mean to, Abby. I don’t, but according to you, we slept together. That means I cheated on my wife, Abigail. My wife. My soulmate.”  
  
She shook her head. “She’s your wife, yes, but if she was your soulmate, she would treat you with the tenderness and care that you deserve. She wouldn’t go around kissing other men, or –“  
  
Austin leaned on the railing and stared out at the little duck pond. “I think sleeping with you trumps whatever Carrie did by leaps and bounds. A kiss is -“  
  
“She obviously feels something for Rafe,” Abby interjected. “Or she wouldn’t have done what she did. And you must have felt something for me too or you never would have made love to me.”  
  
Austin’s grip tightened on the railing until his knuckles were white. “I was drunk! I was –"  
  
“You knew what you were doing, Austin. You said my name many times while we were making love. You knew I was the one you were with. You know it now too. Maybe you just don’t want to remember, because then you will have to admit your marriage to Carrie really is over.”  
  
“Abby, dammit, Carrie and I have been together since she was just a teenager. I am not going to throw all that away because we –“  
  
“Say it, Austin. Look at me and admit the truth. Admit you know we made love and it was beautiful.” She walked over to him and he started to move away, but he backed up right into the opposite railing. He was cornered. Anger percolated in the liquidy azure depths of his eyes, but there was something else in them too. Desire, perhaps. She had to know if he still wanted her, or if she was just wasting her time.  
  
“Let me help you remember everything,” Abby said, reaching for his hand and resting it on her cheek. “Remember how you touched me here, and everywhere else. Remember how my skin felt, and how my lips tasted, and the things you said, and the way –“  
  
“Abby," he growled.  
  
“Austin, please remember everything, so you know that I didn’t trick you. Remember how much you wanted to touch me; the same way I wanted to touch you, and still do.”  
  
 _“Abby!”_ He practically shouted her name as she took his hand and placed it on her own slender right hip. She snuggled into his chest; her head fitting perfectly underneath his chin. She moved her free hand up to his chest and placed it over his heart, feeling the stalwart, rhythmic beating beneath her palm. He was frozen in place, his eyes riveted on hers as she slowly rose up onto her tiptoes and softly pressed her lips to his.  
  
He returned the kiss. She could feel how much he wanted her mouth on his; how much he craved it; craved _her,_ and then, suddenly he wrenched forcefully away from her. “Don’t do that again!” Austin snapped. “Abby, _don’t!_ We may have slept together, but I was drunk and it was the _biggest_ mistake of my life.”  
  
Abby’s hand flew to her mouth, cupping her bruised, puffy lips in shock. Tears pooled in her eyes as she turned and ran away as fast as she could.  
  
XoXoXo  
  
Austin wanted to kick himself. He wanted to kick himself very hard. He deserved it.  
  
Instead, he sagged against the bridge railing, and willed himself not to run after Abby. He knew what they had done was so wrong but in the moment she was kissing him again, it had felt anything but. He had only stopped her because he was trying to do the right thing. _As if he was so honorable._  
  
“Yeah, right,” he muttered. “I’m a scoundrel. I’m a user.”  
  
Deep down what troubled him the most was that he had hurt Abby. She was a really good person -- an amazing woman -- and he went and devastated her today. Why did he have to go and break such a beautiful spirit -- all because he was too afraid to admit the truth?


End file.
